sorry bout these arriving late..

...but got totally ultra drunk last nite with some chums, me head feels like there's a flock of geese living in it :-(

Two dinosaurs walked on the beach right up to the waters edge looking at the boat sailing off in the distance.

One said, "Fuck off then Noah you cunt."
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My first thought when I woke up today was, 'Thank God I'm not Egyptian.'

Not because of the political unrest over there; I'm just racist!...say what you like about Egypt...

No seriously, they don't have the internet, they won't find out. =========
I've just had a tattoo done on my arse which says, "If you're reading this, we're in prison."
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Midgets..

First to smell a fart and last to find out it's raining.
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I was telling my gran that I was taking this fit girl camping next week.
She asked, "Are you pitching a tent?"
I said, "Nah, just nursing a semi."
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When a person with a bad limp gets drunk, do they walk normal?
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Me and my friend were masturbating to some hardcore dinosaur pornography.

Unfortunately, my mothersaurus.
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Every new Mcdonalds creates 40 jobs.

20 dentists and 20 heart surgeons
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BBC NEWS: "Libraries protest day being held."

"Whadda we want?!"

"Shhhh!"